One more thing…

One more thing I intended to blog about last week but forgot… I don’t know why I feel the need to explain my train of thought.. but I’ll try : It all started when I was reading that discussion board Chantal pointed me to last week. I was reading posts written by her husband. His profile photo is one of their son as a baby sitting at the computer. (I hope it’s okay that I’m blogging so much about Chantal and her family today hehe) Then I started thinking, for some weird reason… isn’t it weird that sperm can create life, and this life grows into a beautiful child ? Of course I know that the woman’s egg plays a major part in this too… but sperm I saw. I touched. (TMI.) I … nevermind. Can’t you relate to something a lot more when you’ve seen it with your own eyes ? I know women have eggs. But I can’t say I’ve ever seen one. I’ve seen pictures of female eggs. I’ve seen pictures of UFO’s too. Anyways.

Then I went outside for a smoke, and this song came stuck in my head : With Arms Wide Open (Creed). Here are the lyrics :

Well just heard the news today
seems my life is going to change
I close my eyes, begin to pray
tears of joy stream down my face

With arms wide open
under the sunlight
welcome to this place
I’ll show you everything
with arms wide open

With arms wide open

Well I don’t know if I’m ready
to be the man I have to be
I take a breath, I take her by my side
we stand in awe, we’ve created life

With arms wide open
under the sunlight
welcome to this place
I’ll show you everything
with arms wide open
now everything has changed
I’ll show you love
I’ll show you everything
with arms wide open

With arms wide open
I’ll show you everything oh yeah
With arms wide open

If I had just one wish only one demand
I hope hes not like me I hope he understands
that he can take this life and hold it by the hand
and he can greet the world with arms wide open

With arms wide open
under the sunlight
welcome to this place
I’ll show you everything
with arms wide open
now everything has changed
I’ll show you love
I’ll show you everything
wth arms wide open

With arms wide open
I’ll show you everything oh yeah
with arms wide open

“We created life”… God creates life. God is in all of us. We create life…. Is there a correlation between the people who have created life and their degree of spirituality ? Do people become more and more spiritual as they become of child-bearing age ? Does your faith grow stronger as you witness a human or animal birth ? Is there a correlation between atheists and infertile people ? Please don’t be offended if you’re an atheist parent, or an religious child free by choice person. I’m just pondering crazy thoughts.

*Slaps forehead*

Oh yeah. duh. So the intent behind the whole previous paragraph, believe it or not, was to blog about the fact that I bought “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to the Bible”. LOL! I have so much more to blog about this, but I really should get back to work. Being paid to blog isn’t that ethical hehe.

My monthly spiritual cycle.

Is it totally weird that my spirituality seems to be connected to my menstrual cycle ? I’m not kidding! It seems to me like everytime I’m due for my period I find myself searching for answers, soul-searching, or sometimes I just feel like the spiritual information whacks me on the head out of nowhere.

I have so much to say about this, that I don’t know how to relay it in a coherent manner. Well to give you an example of what I’m talking about.. I’m due for my period. In the cramping stages. (sorry TMI.) Last week I find Heather’s “seeking refinement” blog that I forgot existed and hadn’t read. Then Chantal and I had conversations about agnostics/religion which led me to peruse a certain discussion board that left me a lot more confused than I started off.

Then this weekend I watched again for the fourth time the quite controversial documentary/story “What the Bleep do we Know”. (I can’t stop noticing my overuse of the word ‘quite’ ever since the second episode of Gilmore Girls I watched.) I was blown away with questions the first time I saw it. It’s about quantum physics/ life/reality being a bunch of quantum possibilities. Through the course of the film, the distinction between science and religion becomes increasingly blurred, since they realize that, in essence, both science and religion describe the same phenomena. The first time I watched it, I found myself doubting God’s presence. Not God. His presence. (Not quite (quite!) sure how to explain…just our perception of what God is/isn’t.) The fourth time I watched it, I started to realize that what I believe is that what Science is trying to prove/describe IS God. They just call it something different.

In the movie they discuss Mr. Masaru Emoto’s water crystal experiments. Dr. Masaru Emoto discovered that crystals formed in frozen water reveal changes when specific, concentrated thoughts are directed toward them. He found that water from clear springs and water that has been exposed to loving words shows brilliant, complex, and colorful snowflake patterns. In contrast, polluted water, or water exposed to negative thoughts, forms incomplete, asymmetrical patterns with dull colors. The first time I ever heard about this was via Chantal. I find that REALLY interresting. Especially considering how big a percentage of water each of us is composed with. There was also the gigantic group meditation experiment in DC (4000 people, apparently reduced the crime rate by 25% that summer in DC etc.).

All that led me to think… if thoughts and feelings affect physical reality. If by producing different focused intentions through written and spoken words and music and literally presenting it to the same water samples, the water appears to “change its expression”. If group meditation can alter the outcome of our reality for the better. Is this why gathering with a group in a church to pray is a good thing ? Is this why even though “God is in my heart and I can talk to Him and pray wherever/whenever”, I could benefit, we could all benefit if I joined the group praying ?

Hmm..

So full of questions. I don’t even know if this entry made sense. I’m pretty sure I have synaesthesia. For example, I often see sounds, or smell colours, or smell memories. In this way, more often than not when I’m full of questions/confused, I see my thoughts all jumbled in this suspended black and white matrix that makes perfect sense to me and is completely coherent in my brain, until I try to word it. I didn’t even know this ’symptom?’ had a name. I discovered that once when we were talking about it on ivillage. And it’s much more common than I thought. Isn’t it weird how because of the internet we sometimes find out that we’re not so weird after all ? Or… do all of us weirdos just get online and gravitate towards one another ? Hmmm…

Who moved my cheese ?

Have you ever read that book “Who moved my cheese?” It’s about ways to deal with change. (In your work and in your life.) I think I’m a split cheese kind of person. On one hand, I LOVE to be impulsive. When I want something, I want it NOW! I’m the type of girl who’ll come home to her husband with all her hair chopped off, and colored several shades darker/lighter. (9/10 times, said husband doesn’t even NOTICE, but that’s a whole other story :P) I’m also the type who’ll decide to go a trip at the last minute, or move the furniture around at 2 o’clock in the morning. BUT I often have a hard time adjusting to the consequences of my impulsive choices. For example after a haircut I’ll stare at myself in the mirror for 10 minutes everytime I use the washroom, trying to imagine different ways to wear my hair so that I like it better.

This time it’s about my living room furniture. It was delivered saturday (YAY!). I LOVE each piece (and there are many, as the sofa is a sectional hehe). All the pieces (Sofa, Chair, TV, Unit shelves etc) all go together really well. My living room looks so radically different. It’s a LOT more comfortable. Yet I can’t get used to it. Yes, I was up at 2 o’clock saturday morning, moving my furniture around. First I have to explain that not only is the new furniture responsible for the huge change, I also finally let DH win the never-ending tv location battle. We’ve been debating about the perfect TV location ever since we moved in our second appartment. 6 ‘homes’ ago.

Of course he prefers functionality over design and aesthetics. Hmph. Our old tv used to sit in a corner. Steph hated that. Apparently watching tv at an angle is just not acceptable. So long story short, the new plasma tv is now mounted to the wall where our couch used to be. Anyways, I should snap a picture or two and ask for your input. Maybe you can put your finger on what’s missing. Is it because the new furniture has no ‘charm’ (aka cat claw marks and dog pee stains) ? Is it because it’s such a different style ? Is it because I’m not used to not having a tv stand/entertainment unit ? Maybe I just need some artwork in there ? The only picture I had in there was in the spot where the new tv is now, so I relocated it in the kitchen/dining room and tossed the two pictures that were there. I was so sick of them. They didn’t go at all with this house and the colors we now have. Is it because it’s an open concept and the eating area looks too formal compared to the contemporary theatre-style living room ?

I should just post pictures tonight to show yall what I mean. (PS I don’t say yall in real life, it just sounds good in my head.) But I’m kind of embarrassed because it’s a work in progress at the moment. The cables are still dangling all over the place and the room feels naked to me with no artwork. Ah well.

Despite the living room’s weirdness, we enjoyed it quite a bit this weekend. Steph bought the “Band of Brothers” mini-series DVD and I bought the first 2 seasons of the Gilmore Girls. We took turns : 1 episode of Band of Brothers for 2 episodes of Gilmore Girls. Because Band of Brothers lasts longer. Oh and we managed to keep Loki from marking on the furniture so far. We just keep him on a leash for now when we’re not in one of the rooms. It’s working for now… until we find a more suitable solution. We thought of putting one of those wireless electric fences under the couch LOL! I don’t know how they work but it would be too cruel.